December 11, 2012
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Of Dogs and Light
I was desperate. I had a dog I couldn’t control and all I did, from the time I got up to the time I went to bed, was chase Annie, yell at Annie, scream hysterically at Annie. If I let her outside, she barked, if I brought her in she peed on the carpet, chased the cat and harassed Riley. If I put her in her crate she yipped, and echoing my mother benchmark for stress, I couldn’t even go to the bathroom by myself. I called a dog trainer. I described my problem.
It seemed clear to me from her tone that either someone like me should never have been allowed to have a dog, or I should have known better than to get the dog I got. She disapproved of the whole situation. She was also busy for the next two weeks, but she would call me back. She never did.
There are certain little paths that my mind seems determined to wander down, and I wandered down the following: Do a lot of people call you up and say, ‘you know, my dog always comes when I call, she never barks, she has perfect house manners–can I bring her in so you can untrain her just a bit? Because really–this is just boring…’
Yesterday Annie and I went to interview another trainer–someone who actually likes Annie–and we are signed up for a new class. The goal of our class is to teach us–Nancy and me–to better read and understand our dog. Someone to whom we can actually say, ‘truthfully, I am woefully dog-stupid and by the time I see what’s coming, it’s already here’. She assures me she can train my dog to behave: or better yet, teach ME how to train my dog to behave. And it will be a small class, so Annie won’t have 11 other dogs to fixate on. We’re looking forward to it.
Having resolved that issue, I turned immediately to my art project, the light box. I have friends who make jewelry and they need to be able to photograph their jewelry, in their own studios, on their own schedule. They are perfectly willing to pay professionals to take shots, and I am perfectly willing to let them: I am more interested in figuring out how someone with a decent camera, some tape, a cardboard box and some tissue paper could make a piece of jewelry, shoot it, and sell it the next day.
A fifth grader could make a light box.
The lighting, however, is proving more troublesome. (Of course it is: photography is light.)
Right now the jury is still out, but it’s a toss-up whether the box I spent two hours creating is going to work as well, if not better, than the $4 foldable laundry hamper I bought at Walmart. So far both are deeply indebted to my fledgling experimentations with Photoshop Elements.
I bought “fresh, energizing light”–I think I should have bought “strong, vibrant light”. These are the box-side descriptions of GE ‘energy smart’ CFL light bulbs.
It’s possible it would help if I knew what CFL stands for.
“Lamp may shatter and cause injury if broken.” Really. Valuable box-side information. Nowhere does it expand on the idea of CFL. Nancy would know.
Annie went to work with Nancy today. Riley and I are going eventually to the dog park. Right now my non-barking dog is outside, barking. He is not the only dog barking–apparently something is going on in the neighborhood. Baying hounds abound.
So I guess I will put on another pair of socks, load the dog in the car and visit the hardware store for stronger lights. And then on to the dog park, where we will run and sniff and property-mark and take a dump and generally ignore most people and most other dogs because that is why we go to the dog park: it’s all about the nose. When Annie goes with us we have to constantly bail her out of social problems, but she’s not coming, so we’ll be free to just dog around at our leisure.
Cheryl will probably talk to other people, but that’s just boring, so we ignore her.
Yup. It’s a good day.
